Ok, so I actually finished the book I started last week (which has to be a speed-reading record for me). It was great. I highly recommend it. In my opinion, what makes for a good book is its ability to make you think about the ideas that are printed on the page and to also make you think about things that are only loosely associated with the ideas printed on the page. This book did both for me.
In the printed idea category, I love this excerpt:
Writer Anne Lamott says that the most powerful sermon in the world is two words: “Me too.”Most of the really close relationships that I have in my life have grown out of the words "Me too." The ability to pour your guts out to someone and have them respond with kindness, understanding, and love is invaluable. The people in my life that have said "Me too." have enabled me to now be the one who can say "Me too."
Me too.
When you’re struggling,
when you are hurting,
wounded, limping, doubting,
questioning, barely hanging on,
moments away from relapse,
and somebody can identify with you –
someone knows the temptations that are at your door,
somebody has felt the pain that you are feeling,
when somebody can look you in the eyes and say, “Me too,”
and they actually mean it –
it can save you.
In the things that are only loosely associated with the printed ideas category:
When I had Harper, I am convinced that God used her to help me understand just how much He loves me. He gave me something that caused my heart to get a hundred times bigger and then said, "See how much you love her? Well, I love her and you a million times more than that." Very effective object lesson.
Now, I think God wants to teach me another aspect of His character through my marriage. I think that He is telling me that if I want to get to know Him better, I need to embrace his version of what marriage is supposed to be. God uses the analogy of marriage many times in the Bible - something that I pretty much glossed over until now. I have a normal marriage. We fight about dirty clothes on the floor and dishes left in the sink. Just like everybody else, right? Well, I no longer want to have a normal marriage. Instead, I want the marriage that God intended me to have. In the same way that He used Harper to teach me about His love, He is going to use my marriage to teach me about grace and forgiveness. Gulp.
Any thoughts?
4 comments:
Well first - me too. Except that it took me WAY longer to get to the marriage realization that it's taken you. As a matter of fact, I used my kids and how much I loved them to basically ignore my marriage for many years. So don't do that. Doesn't look like you are. Other than that, I'm praying for you - it's easy to love our children (especially Harper) - our spouses, TOTALLY different story sometimes. But God gave Adam a partner (wife) before He gave them children. There was and is a divine reason for that order I believe.
just one thought...???
hmmmm...
marriage is hard.
you MUST put God first, then Rob, then Harper.
Okay...that was two thoughts...
Will be praying for you to have the marriage as God intended...Nick and I are constantly working on the same thing!
Marriage is hard. So is rasing children. I have found it impossible to do either one without the love and grace of God. I've heard that the best thing you can do for your kids is to have a loving relationship with their father/mother. I think the best thing you can do for your children is to have a relationship with THE FATHER.
As someone who has lost her marriage before she learned that God had given it as a gift to her, let me encourage you to continue to do as you are doing and keep listening to the Father. "Gulp", is right, but you know the more you listen the better it sounds right, mostly because it is. :) I have four kids who I have loved selfishly and dearly but now I do know that I love God first and foremost and I know that grace and forgiveness are the key pieces to loving your spouse. I wish I had known this 10 years ago but He has shown me a Grace to live without the marriage for this season... I often think about Job....God allowed his children to be taken and all....but left the wife. Now if only she had been in union with God.... maybe she could have said "me too" and loved God and Job in the way God desired her to love her spouse.
Anyway, I really loved your post for it's honesty and I love to hear that unselfish thought is going into a relationship in this totally self absorbed and sin-cursed world of ours. Keep it real and it will stay strong.
God's blessing on your relationship with Him, your marriage and your family.
In Him,
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