Taste Impairment

So, I'm back.

Did you miss me?


I hope you're not expecting a long profound post for my foray back into the blogosphere, because you are going to be disappointed if you are.


Instead, I am going to update you on the state of my taste buds. (The next post will include something profound-ish and/or a picture of my kid. Promise.)


So without further ado... 


On Saturday, I bought some new mouthwash.

This particular mouthwash promises to:
                    1. rebuild my enamel
                    2. prevent cavities
                    3. clean my teeth and gums 
                    4. freshen my breath 


All without the burn of alcohol!


Could there be anything better?


So I tried said mouthwash on Saturday night. On Sunday morning, I woke up, brushed my teeth and used the mouthwash for a second time. 


And while I am confident that my enamel is being rebuilt, my cavities are being prevented, my teeth and gums are being cleaned, and my breath is being freshened...


I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO TASTE ANYTHING FOR THREE DAYS!


I used this mouthwash TWO times and THREE days later, I still cannot taste a darn thing. 


So...I did a little digging on the interwebs and it turns out that this mouthwash contains a chemical called cetylpyridinium chloride. It's an antiseptic that is also used (alarmingly!) in some pesticides. 


Not only does it kill microorganisms, but it can also cause taste impairment in some people -- LIKE ME! Furthermore, it can cause some people's teeth to turn brown! 


Not super helpful, if you are shooting for pearly whites!


NONE of this is contained on the label. Seems like it should be. 


Needless to say, I will not be using this product again. 


For now, I will wait patiently for my taste buds to recover so I can taste things again. 


Anything.


I would just like to taste SOMETHING. 


PLEASE. 


And for the record, P&G Dental Hygiene Department, you need to put this kind of thing on the label. 

Elton, Spiders, Music, and Listerine

Sometimes Harper likes to channel Elton John.

Spiders are not cool. Spider webs on my front porch bedazzeled with dew are cool.

I heard on my local public radio station this morning that the station is going to stop playing classical music during the day. Instead, they are going to have news programs all day long. While I thoroughly enjoy listening to NPR during my morning and afternoon commutes, I find it troubling that a public radio station in Music City is no longer going to play any music. I also find it disappointing that no other radio station in the Nashville listening radius plays classical music at all.

One more thing for today...why does Listerine have to burn the crap out of my mouth? Just wondering.

Taking A Bite Out Of Crime

The details are as follows. Yesterday at approximately 3:10pm, Harper was bitten by one of the boys in her class. As is the policy of her baby school, her teachers would not reveal the name of the biter. Harper is not a rat and has also chosen to conceal the identity of the boy. Her teachers did tell me that she did not cry. She just whimpered, pointed at her arm, and then pointed to the culprit - an amazing feat because as of 9:15 this morning, she still has teeth marks on her arm. The video that follows is my attempt to get to the bottom of this heinous crime. The names have not been changed to protect the innocent (it's ok, their moms don't read this blog).

Random Tuesday

A few random thoughts/comments for today:

• Disclaimer: I am about to make a sweeping generalization. I know it doesn't hold true for every person that fits into this category. But in my experience, the validity of my theory is uncanny. Ok, here it is. People who drive PT Cruisers are the worst drivers on the road. If there is some sort of unnecessary congestion on the highway, chances are a PT Cruiser is involved. If someone is driving down the middle of the turning lane, chances are they are driving a Cruiser. Don't just take my word for it. The next time you see someone driving a PT Cruiser, keep an eye on them. I bet they do something ridiculous. I don't actually know anyone who drives a PT Cruiser, so if you are reading this and you do indeed drive a PT Cruiser, I am not talking about you. Fair enough?
• Harper is getting a new tooth. Finally. She has been the 7-toothed wonder for months now. It's about time she got a new one. That being said...from 2:30am - 5:30am we were hanging out on the couch - a direct result of the new tooth. To compensate myself for the interrupted sleep, I had a doughnut for breakfast. 
• Here's a cool YouTube video I recently came across. Basically, they cut, pasted, and mixed together a bunch of unrelated YouTube videos to make this song. What you see is what you hear. I think it's a pretty cool idea. 

Brushing Harper's Teeth

Harper has 7 little teeth now so it's time to start teaching her how to brush them. Basically, she holds a toothbrush while I brush her teeth and then she tries it. It's actually working really well. This is only our second attempt and she's getting the hang of it already. 

Teeth Trauma

A fellow blogger reminded me of this story and I thought I would share it with you. I open things with my teeth. If I can't get something open with my hands, my first inclination is to use me teeth. Growing up, my mom warned me that if I kept doing that, one day I would break them. I didn't believe her. About three years ago I chipped my front tooth at work while trying to pry apart two glass microscope slides. It isn't very noticeable, but it just goes to prove that my mom is always right. About everything. Seriously. 

Not a picture of me, by the way. 

I Hate the Dentist

I hate the dentist - or should I say, I hate what the dentist told me this morning. Let me preface this by saying that I have always had (what I thought to be) good teeth. I'm 28 years old and have never had a cavity - which is very surprising considering the copious amounts of candy I eat. My teeth are straight (after only 8 months worth of braces in 4th grade). Even my wisdom teeth are small, straight, still in my mouth, and don't hurt (we'll get to them in a minute). So... imagine my surprise this morning when I went to the dentist and he told me that:

 

1. The amount of ware on my teeth do to grinding them is equivalent to what he would expect to see in a 50-60 year old patient.

2. Because I grind my teeth and have worn them down (especially the back molars), I will need to have one root canal and crown immediately and I can expect to need 3-4 more crowns in the future.

3. My wisdom teeth are infected and the infection is spreading to the neighboring teeth (what???).

4. My wisdom teeth should be removed asap and I should get injections of antibiotic into the neighboring teeth to kill any residual infection.

Awesome. 

I know that many of you are thinking that you have had one or more of the above conditions and that it's really no big deal. This is of no real comfort to me. I am afraid. I am afraid of the pain that I may experience. I am afraid of being put under anesthesia. This totally stinks. And to top it all off, I almost burst into tears (at work) today after reading Ryan's post on his blog for today - and I don't even like dogs!

Bottom line - I think I'm going to get a second opinion. So if any of you know a good dentist in Nashville, please let me know.